How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize