the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
