i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
