Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
