I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
