I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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