Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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