i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
