It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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