I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
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