Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
