What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Randomize
