I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
