So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
