My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you didnt know i had herpes?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I need a burrito and a hug.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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