Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
