so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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