I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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