I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
