i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
