I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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