What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
This toilet bowl is my home.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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