Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
BRING THE BAGELS
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize
