I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
