i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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