that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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