So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
