speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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