Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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