I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize