Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
