im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
