just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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