halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
