You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
