what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
