Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
