I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
