my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
