never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
