dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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