It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
