This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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