fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
