Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize