sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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