It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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