Why are handjobs necessary in class?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
