Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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