I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
