Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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